Desert Island Discs

Just because nobody invited me doesn’t mean I can’t have fun.

Desert Island Discs is one of the all-time great interview formats. Partially a way for politicians and public figures to curate an artistic identity which speaks to how they present themselves [1] but moreso a way to understand the things which formed interesting people, the format blends biographically-focussed interview with the music which impacted you and the luxury is a left-field question which elucidates so much about a person. I enjoy listening to DID [2] and do find it a powerful way to connect with a way of thinking. I think music illustrates our thought patterns, our loves, and shows us what we’ve found impactful on our journey through life. I caveat my own choices with a) I am too young and unimportant to be on this show, and b) my choices are, of course, subject to change, so should I have the luxury to become old and significant I do not guarantee that this is what you will hear as I’m interviewed.

8 tracks

Layla by Derek and the Dominoes

We have to start with Layla, because it stands in for the music I got from my parents. My mum loved pop, mainly from the 60s and the 80s and infused with RnB – Motown, The Beatles, through into The Bangles and Annie Lennox. My dad was a rock guy, and singer-songwriters too (especially female singer-songwriters, like Joni Mitchell and Tori Amos). It was so hard to make this list without a Bruce Springsteen track – I grew up in a house where the CD collection took up a whole wall of the living room, and a full shelf was my dad’s Springsteen bootlegs. Music was so important to me growing up – it was taken very seriously by my dad, who always had a very fancy hi-fi, and it was something my mum particularly enjoyed too. My dad likes to listen, my mum likes to sing along.

When I went to school, I was lucky enough to go to the fancy school a town away, and my mum got a job at another school in that same town to support me by driving me there. We used to alternate whose go it was to choose the CD we’d listen to, so she exposed me to a lot of classics that way. My dad’s CD collection was able to be browsed, and by the time I got an iPod I was plucking his records off the shelf to listen to in my own time.

I’ve chosen Layla in particular because it was my ringtone for many years. It was my favourite song, so I changed up the file type and did the necessary things to set it as my ringtone for several phones – hearing the beginning riff in any context still makes me sit up straight. I also think I’d love it on the desert island: the transition from jerky guitar rock to smooth piano is legendary, and I can listen to this song on repeat even now. Because of the influence of my parents, I feel quite educated in music for somebody who has no grounding as a musician or professional connection to music. I might be incredibly tone-deaf, but I can often hear and identify influences and appreciate general musicality more than I might otherwise be able to.

Aquarium (Carnival of the Animals) by Saint-Saëns

So I always loved the interpolation of this in Beauty and the Beast. It’s the moment Belle is finding awe in the enchanted castle and the world – this dishevelled, gothic world – opens up before her, and she finds adventure, in a way that suits her, where she expected to find imprisonment. The music itself is so beautiful, but I love what Howard Ashman[3] can do with a score to show how he understands emotionality, and it really speaks to her being a bookish person – able to intuit, romanticise, and be curious all together. It’s also the moment where the story truly starts: it’s been all setup until now, but from here it’s Belle’s story – she’ll drive the narrative, and the characters will develop into the people the story is telling you they can be. Very Northanger Abbey! And the visuals of her eyes taking in new information I think matches perfectly with the glassy sound of this piece. I’m not a ‘Disney adult’ but I did grow up loving the princesses, and Barbie, and I particularly loved this one and Sleeping Beauty, which uses Tchaikovsky, so I do think the music was a big part of how the love grew for me.

I’m also putting this piece in for a bit of a dickhead reason: I played it at my wedding, and some people thought it was from Harry Potter. Nope! I might have grown to love it from a childish piece of media, but not that one. I’ve only seen the first couple of those movies so they didn’t impact me the same way a lot of people from my generation have found themselves attached to them.

Mr Brightside by The Killers

If you asked me my favourite song, I’d probably give this as the answer. I was a huge Killers fan at their peak and have followed them ever since. This is the song I hope everyone remembers me to when they hear it, the song I will defend to the end and play at every party.

In lieu of something more significant to say about this song beyond I really, really love it, let me tell you about the outfit I wore to see The Killers in 2009. Picture this: head-to-foot white, including a bleach-blonde emo-fringe pixie-cut. White button-down shirt, white skinny jeans, white plimsolls. Then: a red vintage military mess jacket. Petrol-blue eyeliner with two dots on my left cheekbone. White eyeshadow worn as contour. I felt like hot shit. I wish there were pictures.

Say Yes To Heaven by Lana del Rey

Another artist I became a really irritating fan of as a teen was Lana del Rey. This has never left me: Lana could do literally anything and I’d buy the limited edition boxed set of her next record. Lana is the reason I don’t have to make music, because she’s doing everything I want and I’d be a subpar imitation of her. I remember going to see her at the o2 academy in Birmingham and even other people who were big enough fans to wait outside were sick of hearing me talk about how ‘no like Young & Beautiful is good but you really have to listen to her unreleased stuff’. Ten years later, one of the best of her hidden songs got an official release, and I’m still as in love with it as I was then. It’s some of her best vocals, some of her best writing, a beautiful sentiment… I would listen to anything Lana wanted to put out, I think she’s a genius, and I couldn’t make this list without her.

Late Night, Early Town by Lloyd Cole

Another of the forever-favourite artists I got from my parents is Lloyd Cole. His Folksinger Vol 2 live album is probably my favourite release of all time – he’s sharp and charming and every song is a banger in possibly its best arrangement. I listened to a lot of Lloyd Cole when I first moved to London, and the collection of poetry that I wrote about that time is named for him [4] – I always walk home, alone, except for Lloyd Cole.

This song in particular feels very true to my ‘young and jaded’ experience of the city. It was London, not Los Angeles, but I found myself seeing people take cocaine in bars I could barely afford to be in, rubbing up against a million people trying to make it, trying to have fun, trying to reinvent themselves. I was trying to get a college degree whilst working full-time, sort-of sad but hopeful and not really sure if I believed in myself so much as who I might become. Because I went to adult education college almost everyone I knew was older than me, and I fitted in much better with these guys than the rare more typical undergraduate I met, so it’s only fitting that my taste in music was really something I’d inherited as I ran around town pretending to be older and gathering stories I don’t even remember unprompted any more as my life was lived so stream-of-consciousness and I was always doing at least three things at once. I was very glamorous back then – if you knew me now, I don’t know if you’d believe it.

Bach’s Goldberg Variations by Vikingur Olafsson

This is the song I walked down the aisle to at my wedding. It’s beautiful. I chose it knowing it would be imbued with sentimentality for the rest of my life, and knowing I wouldn’t mind that – it’s serene happiness to me, and I can’t help but imagine the cast iron stairs I walked down at the library, seeing my now-husband on the opposite staircase and feeling like I have never made a better decision than marrying him. At our honeymoon in Japan I found the CD at Tower Records and took it home, so my whole wedding and honeymoon is Bach played by Vikingur Olafsson. I still listen to my wedding playlist quite a lot – I spent months curating it to suit both mine and my husband’s tastes, to be classic and classy and 100% bangers. [5]

I never used to understand, from my childhood pure-pop-rock sentimentality, how people always had a classical track on their Desert Island Discs. ‘Who even listens to classical anymore? They’re just pretending!’ I thought. I have since learned to appreciate classical music and have several playlists I’ve curated of various moods, from bombastic joy to mournful piano. My husband prefers classical – he loves waltzes, and Satie, and solo players, so we had a wedding that was purely instrumental, and I wouldn’t change it for the world.

Reliquia by Rosalìa

I’m surprised at myself for this one – I wouldn’t even consider it my favourite track on the album [6] but I think it’s perfect. It’s so well crafted lyrically, as well as in its layers and musicality. When I hear it I see Rosalìa spinning around at the Latin grammys, and I want to listen to it again but also more music, forever. I love LUX, I think it’s truly a perfect album and a triumph of vision and skill, and I could listen to this song on repeat forever.

Renegade by Taylor Swift

I could talk about Taylor all day. There is a version of this list that’s 8 Taylor tracks [7] and I couldn’t decide whether YOYOK would bring me the most solace when I was, indeed, on my own (kid)… but Renegade is my Taylor song. I think it’s the most underrated lyricism in her discography, demonstrates her musical aptitude; it’s sad, angry, just upbeat enough, it’s a story I can relate to from both sides… I love it so much, and I think it’s so underrated that I if I only get to talk about one Taylor Swift song, I will talk about this one. Everyone should know it and worship it.

1 Book

I found the book probably the hardest thing to decide on. Do you choose a book you really want to get to grips with (like Ulysses) or a book you could read over and over again (like I Capture The Castle)? I think I’d have to choose something Romantic: there’s a reason I’ve nailed my colours to Romanticism, and that’s because it speaks to me so profoundly on both an aesthetic and philosophical level. Please may you allow me to cheat slightly, and take (alongside Quaker Faith & Practice and The Complete Works of Shakespeare) a bind-up of the complete works of the Brontë Sisters? There are a couple of Charlottes I haven’t read, and each of the sisters managed to write a book I consider among my very favourites. Plus, I’m not a very desert-y person and would love to be reminded of the wind and the rain of the Yorkshire moors – a climate I would be much more appreciative of being trapped in.

1 Luxury

A luxury in this context has to tell the listener something about you. Much as I’d love to take a journalling set, with fountain pens, inks, cleaning fluid, and stickers, I’m not sure that tells you anything about me you didn’t know already, and wouldn’t guess by looking at me. It’s a true luxury, but not a fun luxury – I’d likely have it in my bag already.

My proclaimed luxury, then, would be: an infinite spice rack. I really love food. I love to eat, I enjoy cooking, and whilst there are certain foods I could eat over and over again, I think the monotony of life on the island would get to me most of all through food. Food is sociable, it’s self-care, and it’s pleasure, and I want to eat nice food, and perhaps even learn and experience new things.

1 track above all

I always thought the record I’d save from being washed away by the waves would be Mr Brightside. On my ‘forever favourite songs’ playlist this is there three times, I could never get sick of it and it means so much to me – it simply is my youth. I’m not young anymore, though, and I think I have to choose the Bach. I would miss my husband terribly on a desert island, and not only is this piece so beautiful I would enjoy listening endlessly, I would want that reminder of a beautiful day, the best man I know, and what it feels like to be loved. Like I said, I consciously chose this for my wedding knowing it would transcend, so I knew it was special before I added this powerful memory to it, and that memory – and all the ongoing memories I make with my family and friends who were there – is something I’d cling to above things I love only for myself.

To get this article, and others, as physical media, subscribe now.

On This Topic:

• The best episodes of DID are Mark Gatiss
• … Pat McGrath…
• and Philip Larkin

To-Do:

• Enter National Poetry Competition
• Submit edited abstract for conference
• Submit new abstract for other conference

Today’s Culture:

• I had either flu or Covid. 1/10, would not recommend. Wash your hands and wear a mask.
• Went to the Lindt store in London to get their pick ‘n’ mix. Wasn’t worth the $$.
• I ordered at-home KBBQ from this store as a treat, because life is too short not to eat KBBQ.

[1] looking at you, David Cameron. There’s no way your choices didn’t go before the Conservative committee before you went on this show.

[2] though I will state now I haven’t listened for years – we don’t have a TV license so I don’t have access to anything the BBC puts out, except at Christmas when I go to my in-laws’ place and binge watch all the TV I’ve missed over the year.

[3] I probably shouldn’t credit this only to Howard Ashman because I know full well that Alan Menken did the score for Beauty and the Beast and Howard was a lyricist, but let’s be real we all know who the genius on that set was and who imbued it with every ounce of life-force they had

[4] I still submit these to competitions so comment if you want to read them because they can’t be online

[5] my wedding playlists: milling, aka before we arrived, ceremony and celebration, move to the second location for dinner. Plus the pop/rock inclusive playlists from the days leading up to: favourites, getting ready, various songs I considered adding

[6] for the interested: Mio Cristo piange diamanti

[7] OK so my Taylor-only Desert Island Discs would be: Renegade, The Lakes, Dress, Cruel Summer live at the Eras tour, Hits Different, ATW10, Picture To Burn, August. Ask me again tomorrow for a totally different list of songs, and again know that none of these are my favourite Taylor song (I’d probably say Peter if pushed, but again it will change daily)