Five Towns and Fenton

I don’t know anyone in these five towns

and Fenton

Cab from the station, or maybe

I can cycle. Overtake me all you like

but we’ll still pull up at the same

red

light.

I’m not sorry I laughed

when I had to go back

the past is a slag-heap dead town

and I clawed what I needed

from the rubble.

---

I bet you didn’t tell him that you saw me

by the hotel on Coram Street.

I’ll take my freedom from my family,

my memories of swingsets

with the only one who valued me.

I hope this ghost town burns to the ground

I’m not about to pretend

words from funerals don’t haunt me

when I learned you didn’t want me

I know you know it’s me

because you look at me on Facebook

I see you

look at me.

Take your ghosts and burn them down

There’s nothing this city holds, no good in this whole town.

---

When I’m back in the place where I made

a home

among other people

who are glad when I come to the phone,

who think I’m a clever little thing. This city

is

mine.

Take your consequences

my curses

take your ghosts back to

other towns

and burn them down.

---

I think I know what you told him when he saw me

descending in the opera house.

He never called, never wrote me,

and I’m back to 8 years old in cabins

when you came with us on our holidays.

This city is mine and I’ll burn it down

before I concede the ground.

8 years old in bed, wondering

what the adults are laughing at. I can hear them.

Ignore me, I’m a fool

who made the mistake

of being happy to see you

ignore me

Take your ghosts and burn them down, I’ll survive

your momentary walking past my life.

---

This short poem was written as part of the ‘Alphabet Superset‘ programme: it is quick work and is unedited.